Cissexism, LGBTQIA, Trans

Tolerance is not acceptance

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Today is the Transgender Day of Remembrance, a day to mourn the lives lost to transphobic violence. With at least 22 trans women, mostly women of color, murdered to date in 2015, our community has a great deal of mourning to do.

This continuing violence is the flip side of visibility in our supposedly progressive times. No trans person, anywhere, is immune. Just this week here in San Francisco, a trans woman was assaulted for a second time. Having moved here from Georgia, she lamented, “I came here to be safe, but we’re really not safe anywhere.”

Many cis people who would never dream of physically attacking a trans person are nonetheless contributing to the violence against us in more subtle ways. Every time someone deliberately misgenders or deadnames a trans person – no matter how famous or problematic that person may be – they are fostering an environment of mistrust and mockery. Every time someone tries to keep us out of restrooms, usually under the guise of protecting (cis) women, they are painting trans people as deviant and dangerous. Every time someone excludes or erases us from participation in online or offline spaces, they are telling the world that we are not worthy of being seen and respected as equals.

Merely tolerating trans people is not enough. We must be respected and treated as fully equal partners in society. That includes non-binary as well as binary trans people. As genderqueer activist Jacob Tobia points out:

The reality is that, even for transgender people who identify as women or as men along the gender binary, when you are mid-transition, you are going to most likely be read as gender non-conforming. So until all gender non-conforming people—whether that’s a place that you’re in temporarily or if that is where you are all the time—are safe, then every trans person is going to encounter discrimination, even if they identify as a trans man or as a trans woman.

Not everyone has the ability to be an activist, but everyone can pay more attention to the cissexist assumptions that fuel transphobic violence. Learn more about trans and non-binary people from the source by reading and sharing our stories.

Photography

Russian Hill walking tour

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[Image: A discolored street sign reading “Russian Hill 000”, with a hedge and tree in the foreground and a house in the background.]

While looking for potential events to photograph this week, I came across a group of free San Francisco walking tours being offered on Veterans Day. Reading the descriptions, and having already visited the Japanese Tea Garden and Coit Tower numerous times, I decided the only remaining tour that might interest me was of Russian Hill, the neighborhood abutting my own, (S)Nob Hill. The City Guide description promised “panoramic views and intimate lanes… artists and eccentrics, Beats and Bohemians, mansions and cottages.”

Russian Hill view
[Image: Scene from atop a steep Russian Hill street.]

Unfortunately, as it turned out, I’m just not that interested in architecture, which was the dominant theme of the tour. I listened with some interest to stories of Jack Kerouac (who stayed briefly in a home we passed by) and other notable residents, but I had little interest or success in photographing the actual buildings. I was more intrigued by some of the non-human residents of the neighborhood:

Caterpillar
[Image: A caterpillar rests on a cobweb-covered metal structure.]

It eventually occurred to me that this was basically a tour about cishet white people. Our group was largely white as well; perhaps three out of the fifteen or so appeared to be Asian, and no one besides myself was brown-skinned. This shouldn’t have been much of a surprise, and back when I was still performing whiteness, I probably wouldn’t have even noticed. But I’m now much more attuned to race and gender issues.

Macondray Lane
[Image: A wooden gate reading Macondray Lane, nestled among trees.]

The capper was at the conclusion of the tour, we walked up the steps of Macondray Lane, the inspiration for Barbary Lane from the famous Tales of the City series. Our tour guide mentioned the series’ origin as a serial in the San Francisco Chronicle before it became a  book series, later a TV series, and a musical – all of which I read, watched, and very much enjoyed. And somehow he managed to completely omit that these notable books were written by an openly gay man, Armistead Maupin, were primarily about queer people (including a trans woman), and were among the first to address the AIDS epidemic.

I do not accuse our tour guide or San Francisco City Guides of any malice or even deliberate exclusion here. This simply wasn’t the right kind of event for me. I’m sure with some effort I could find an “underground San Francisco” style tour, that would talk more openly about the elements of this city that I can connect with better.

Regardless, I’m not sorry I attended. I met and chatted with a nice couple from Berkeley, and gave them the first of my new business cards when they asked about my blog. I also got some needed exercise; early November in San Francisco is a beautiful time of year, with perfect walking weather before the steady rains of winter arrive.

The few photos from this tour that I felt were worthy of posting are on Flickr. I’ll look for future events that are more suited to my photographic skills and personal taste.

LGBTQIA, Trans

Sharing trans stories on Medium

[Image: Banner reading “We the T! A Matter + Gender 2.0 Collaboration”]

I’m pleased to announce that I’m now officially a co-editor of the Gender 2.0 publication on Medium, which I’ve been contributing to for the last two months. I just sent out a letter about our project to our 1100+ subscribers, co-written by fellow editor Meredith Talusan, who wrote that Buzzfeed article on restrooms I was featured in last week.

We’re always looking for more good stories from trans people, so please contact me if you have something to contribute! I’m liking the Medium web site more and more for reading, writing, and commenting on quality stories.

Photography

Día de los Muertos

[Image: A child with their face painted and an adult sit in the dark, holding candles.]

Last night I attended a Día de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) event in the Excelsior district of San Francisco. This was a family-oriented gathering, meant to honor and respect the dead. Many children were present, and activities for them included face painting and crafts.

Face painting
[Image: An adult paints the face of a child, who is wearing colorful clothing and flowers in their hair.]

Some kids were also walking around on stilts!

Stilt walkers at Día de los Muertos
[Image: Children on stilts walk outdoors, with adults watching.]

A number of altars were set up around the playground where the event was held. Read the story of Alex Nieto, a Latino victim of police violence, featured in this altar. There’s a press conference regarding his case tomorrow.

Día de los Muertos altar
[Image: A Día de los Muertos altar, featuring a framed drawing of Alex Nieto.]

One of my primary interests in attending was watching and photographing the native ceremony and dance. Unfortunately, as the event took place after sunset and the available light was extremely limited, I was unable to get many decent photos once the performance started. This was disappointing, as low-light photography is my specialty, but I won’t use flash for performances.

Día de los Muertos drummer
[Image: A drummer in native costume practices at a Día de los Muertos event.]

Ironically, the last time I photographed a Día de los Muertos event, in San Jose in 2010, the strong noon sunlight also made photography a challenge. But light at least makes photography possible, and I got many good photos then.

Despite the logistical challenges (aside from the darkness, I got lost getting to the location, which was in an unfamiliar neighborhood), I felt empowered attending this event, which had a strong representation of people of color. The face of San Francisco is not white, despite what you might guess from the saturation of tech companies and premium housing. More than half of us are PoC. We cannot allow gentrification to continue to force us out, wipe out native cultures and traditions.

As usual, I’ve uploaded the full set of photos to Flickr. If you like my work, please consider sponsoring me on Patreon or leaving me a tip. Thanks to my sponsors, I’ve met my first milestone goal, and now have new business cards. I only need another ten dollars a month in donations to meet my second goal: Expanded disk storage, which is greatly needed if I’m to continue my photography work. Anything you can contribute would be most appreciated.

Cissexism, LGBTQIA, Trans

More buzz on restrooms

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[Image: Pax self-portrait in a bathroom mirror.]

After I re-posted one of my restroom equality blog posts on Medium, the Gender 2.0 co-editor asked if I would share a personal account for a BuzzFeed article she was working on. I shared an incident that happened in January (adapted from a Facebook post I made at that time), when I was called out in a men’s room in a San Francisco park. She asked me to take a selfie in a restroom, public or private; I did so wearing the same clothes that I wore at the time of the incident (ten months ago).

The BuzzFeed article was posted today. The accounts from the other trans people range from humorous to heartbreaking. Some of the comments are horrible, as expected, but I signed up for a BuzzFeed account just to leave my own feedback. (I’m glad they don’t require Facebook to be used for the comments.)

We must keep on sharing our stories. Trans and nonbinary people, take to social media!

Cissexism, LGBTQIA, Trans

Houston votes for hate

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[Image: Emmie, a young girl with long blond hair and a frilly blue dress, sings into a microphone on an outdoor stage, with onlookers smiling and clapping in the background.]

When I cast my vote yesterday, the many San Francisco ballot measures were my primary reason for going to the polls. As usual, some results went my way, and some did not. But from my perspective, one of the most important defeats was not in my own city. It was in Houston, Texas, where voters defeated a proposed equal rights ordinance that would have banned discrimination against oppressed people, including trans people, in employment, housing, and public accommodations.

The reason? Hate campaigns that convinced voters that men would take advantage of the legislation to prey on women in restrooms and locker rooms. Because once again, transmisogyny rules the day. Many people simply refuse to believe that trans women are actually women, and not men dressed as women. Despite a complete lack of of evidence that allowing trans people to use the correct restrooms has resulted in any increase in sexual harassment or assaults (which are already illegal in any case), cissexists refuse to acknowledge that we just need to pee.

The growth of anti-trans sentiment is the flip side of visibility. Trans people – trans women of color in particular – are not immune from violence or discrimination anywhere. In the wake of the Houston defeat, the Transgender Law Center has alerted supporters to fight a trans discrimination initiative here in California.

The victims of this hate have done nothing to deserve their fate. Look at the little girl pictured at the top of this post, singing at the Trans March. Her name is Emmie. I don’t know much about her, but I do know that she is a girl, and that she would be very out of place in a boy’s restroom. Who cares what her chromosomes are, or what genitals she has? What kind of warped person wants to know what is between a child’s legs before they’ll allow them to use a restroom?

Trans girls are girls. Trans women are women. They use restrooms for the same reason as any other girls and women do. Let them go in peace.

Classism

Election Day

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[Image: Sunset at the National Mall, Washington D.C. ]

Tomorrow is Election Day in the USA. As I have done virtually every year since I first became eligible in 1988, I will be casting a ballot. But I’m not excited about it, because I know that “electable” politicians do not support what is most important to me: True equity and justice for all, regardless of gender, race, sexual orientation, or species.

Unlike many progressives, I don’t subscribe to the “lesser of two evils” rhetoric. First of all, as I’ve written before, I don’t believe people are evil or good; rather, people only take more or less harmful actions. Nor do I say that there is no difference between the Democrats and the Republicans. I’m simply too radical to support the two-party system, and I don’t want to vote for someone whose positions I don’t like.

Ultimately, all major parties in this country uphold capitalism, which I can no longer support. I was registered with the Green Party for a long time, but when I changed my name last year I updated my voter registration to “Decline to State.” (Unfortunately I failed to realize that by registering to vote online, I would be added to a zillion mailing lists.) I still review the Green Party endorsements, but generally I vote only for ballot measures and non-partisan offices.

We do have a lot of measures on the ballot here in San Francisco, so I’ll be glad to exercise my civic duty in trying to make this ridiculously expensive city more livable.  I’ve posted before about Proposition I; I won’t make any other endorsements here. Wherever you live, if you’re eligible to vote, I encourage you to read the ballot, not just the political ads, and make your own informed decisions.

Cissexism, Racism

What not to wear for Halloween

[Image: Drummers wearing face paint march in a Dia de los Muertos parade.]

Halloween is not one of my favorite holidays. I’m really not into the occult, I don’t much enjoy playing dress-up, and most mass-marketed candy is not vegan (and, in the case of much vegan chocolate, possibly unethical). Lots of people do enjoy this holiday, however, and will be celebrating this weekend. Some are likely still deciding what costumes to wear.

Unfortunately, many will choose to wear a costume that is insensitive or downright offensive. Such people will often decry concerns for cultural appropriation and oppression as “political correctness.” But asking people to be aware of the impact of their clothing choices is simply asking them to treat others with respect.

Here’s a primer from Kat Blaque on why cultures are not costumes:

https://youtu.be/fduWPOlgQYs

And a spoken word performance by Raven McGill about white people who thought it was funny to put on blackface and dress up like Trayvon Martin:

Finally,  some more thoughts by Kat Blaque on what’s wrong with the costume based on Caitlyn Jenner’s Vanity Fair cover:

https://youtu.be/sk3GTF4bxYQ

With infinite choices of what to wear on Halloween, there’s no reason to parody someone else’s culture, ethnicity, or gender identity. “Free speech” does not mean freedom from the consequences of that speech. For those who live every day with oppression, the negative impact of converting their lives to costumes is very real.

ETA: Also see this article with suggestions on how to talk to someone who is wearing a Native American costume.

Cissexism, Veganism

Healthy Hermit conclusion, diet and sex thoughts

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I’ve decided to formally conclude my Healthy Hermit diet, and reintroduce other whole plant foods besides fruits and vegetables. This is not because of my recent illness, but for practical reasons. My partner doesn’t share this way of eating, and it’s inefficient for us to eat separate meals all of the time. As he hasn’t had time to cook he’s been buying more packaged products, which negates much of the environmental benefit of me shopping from farmers markets. While I have made a few dishes we can both eat, we’d have a wider variety if I could use beans, whole grains, nuts, and seeds, which I can do without compromising my nutritional goals.

During the 24 days of this diet I lost ten pounds and about two inches of fat off of my waist. That’s quite rapid weight loss for someone who wasn’t heavy to begin with, though having a lower appetite due to the flu was also a factor. I currently weigh 120 lbs and have a 28 inch waist, which on a 5′ 4″ body is considered by many to be downright scrawny for a male, but would be considered chunky for a female in many circles, which just goes to show how arbitrary beauty standards are in our society.

I don’t, however, feel that body measurements are entirely useless. Rather than arbitrary height-weight charts or body mass index, I believe waist-to-height ratio is a better indicator of health risk, but that too is only one factor among many that must be considered. And regardless, as I’ve written before, no one’s size besides my own is any of my business.

An issue I have with all of these health charts is that they normally ask for a binary sex to be specified. Unlike with some web forms where sex and gender are clearly irrelevant, there are legitimate differences in height and weight for cistypical male and female bodies. I, however, do not have a cistypical body; I have a transsexual male body. I’ve been on testosterone for enough time that my body has “masculinized” to a certain extent, but it could be several more years before the changes are complete. My height is fixed, but my muscle mass and many other characteristics are not.

So when I filled out my nutrient profile, I specified male. But had I specified female, different target numbers would have come up for calories and various nutrients. These differences aren’t completely arbitrary; a menstruating woman will have a higher need for iron, for example. But not all cis women menstruate, and some cis men may have higher iron requirements for various reasons.

Even in the medical realm, when it comes to sex differences, lifestyle choices cannot be ignored.  When I elected to begin testosterone therapy, I needed to sign a consent form that said, among other things, that by taking this hormone I might be taking five years off of my life expectancy. I asked the nurse practitioner how much of this discrepancy might be due to men engaging in more high-risk behavior (smoking, drinking, violence) than women, rather than internal physical differences brought on by hormones. She said she honestly didn’t know because there hadn’t been studies on FTM patients in this area.

Regardless, I intend to keep my body as healthy as reasonably possible. Avoiding smoking, drinking, recreational drugs, and junk food isn’t a matter of personal purity for me; it’s a matter of finding pleasure without resorting to artificial, short-lived highs. Whole plant foods, clean air and water, exercise, and sunshine can provide what I need to be fulfilled.

Ableism, Classism, Speciesism, Veganism

Vegans and health shaming

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I’ve been quiet for the last week because I came down with the flu. This one hit me hard enough to keep me offline almost entirely for two days, which is very unusual for me. My temperature got above 103 before my fever broke. (I do have a history of high fevers.) I don’t get flu shots anymore because I’m not in a high-risk category, and two of the three times I did get a shot (when I worked at a health sciences university that strongly encouraged them and provided them for free) I got the flu anyway.

Some vegans are afraid to admit when they get sick because of the false idea spread by many health-oriented vegans that eating a plant-based diet prevents illness. I’ve frequently read people bragging that they haven’t had the slightest sniffle since giving up animal products. If others get sick, they must not be “pure” enough. They need to eat a whole-foods diet, or better yet, a raw diet, or have a juice cleanse, or otherwise purge their system of all pollutants, and then they’ll never get sick again.

Illness doesn’t work that way. It can strike anyone without warning, even those of us who lead very healthy lifestyles. The creator of the FatFree Vegan Kitchen web site wrote a moving piece about being diagnosed with cancer despite following a lowfat, whole-foods plant-based diet. Sometimes these kinds of confessionals end in the author tearfully saying goodbye to their vegan diet, but this was not one of those cases; she wrote, “So if you’re reading this and worrying that I’m going to be another vegan blogger who goes back to eating animals for her own health, don’t. No diagnosis in the world could convince me to eat another animal or animal product.” (Emphasis in original.)

Some vegans get very sick, and some non-vegans live long, robust, illness-free lives. This is why I do not use human health benefits to promote veganism. The only person whose health is guaranteed to be harmed by a non-vegan diet is the animal whose flesh, milk, or eggs are on the plate. When we realize that their desire to live is as strong as ours, we will stop eating them for their sake, not for ours.

Another form of vegan health shaming is criticizing those who use pharmaceuticals containing animal products or tested on animals. I am opposed to all forms of animal use, but I recognize that in a deeply speciesist world, animal products are so ubiquitous that in some cases their use is unavoidable. If a person can avoid death or serious health consequences by using animal-derived or tested products, I will not condemn them for it. It would be better for them to live and become activists for animal liberation, working toward a time when no animals are used as ingredients or imprisoned in laboratories. This is consistent with my stance on those who “fail to thrive” on a pure vegan diet.

Regardless of diet or philosophy, the number one thing that people who do get ill need is rest, and in the USA that commodity is in short supply. Employers don’t give adequate sick leave, and advertisements abound for over-the-counter medications to allow people to mask their symptoms and keep working, thus spreading their germs to everyone else in the office. Whether self-employed or working for an employer, working while sick is considered a virtue, and for many, unfortunately, is a financial necessity.

I’m fortunate that I always had enough sick leave during my fifteen years of full-time employment. Part of why doing hired photo gigs didn’t work out for me was that if I became ill I either had to work sick, find a replacement, or lose the gig. Replacements don’t work out so well when you’re doing a job that relies on your unique creative vision and process. I ended up shooting my first wedding with a stomach bug (which I’d determined was non-contagious, but did make for a miserable day.)

Our health is the most important asset we have. We should work to make nutritious food available and affordable to everyone, but recognize that even with the healthiest possible diet and exercise program, some will fall ill. Those who do need the time and support for true recovery. There’s no shame in being sick.

filed by Pax Ahimsa Gethen